February 7, 2023

I had a wonderful awakening today. Also, I’ve started 50mg today! I felt as if I had a surge of energy for a little while.

I started on my new regimen of 50 milligrams today i discovered something what i went through when i first started the 25 milligrams of circulating is what happened today at least for the first half of this day and that was that i had energy a little too much energy so i decided i would go for a walk i did that for approximately an hour or a little more than

That went for a long walk and then i came back home and i actually felt good enough to change my bed sheets my bed linens and then i washed some clothes something that sometimes is very hard for me to do but i got that done and then afterwards i decided that i would um go on an outing with a family member of mine i wasn’t sure if i would have been able to make

It and i will get back to that in a minute regarding decisions when you when you have your mental health situations but i realized that it would not be too bad at that moment so um i went out to another town and walked around for a little bit even though i then got a bit tired in the midst of it but it was nice to actually be out and return and now i’m a bit

Yeah flatlining um have a bit of an upset stomach but all in stride all in stride so to return to what i was saying earlier about um planning and deciding right there and then that i will go on my little outing one thing i’ve discovered about this whole situation regarding mental health and dealing with your meds and things is that you have to take things one

Moment at a time you cannot plan warehead because you do not know how your body will be behaving way ahead it changes literally with every passing moment which is all right as long as you are comfortable with that you become comfortable with the fact that you have to manage your life in increments instead of really long distance plans and all of that you’ll be

Good then it wouldn’t frustrate you so much so i would suggest to you if you are new to circulane or any other antidepressant or ssri please know that you may need to manage your life in yeah narrower rather than further away and in increments so then what are my symptoms today as i sit here and talk to you i actually have a bit of nausea i did not have much

Of this the first week i mean today is day seven um but i did not have much nausea at all with 25 milligrams but now as i sit here and i talk to you i can feel the nausea um that this is not gonna last forever this is something you must know these things are not gonna last forever okay um but um but yeah this is a new symptom i am tired i’m fatigued i had my

Anxiety this morning even when i went walking i was very hyper um very alert i cannot remember the word maybe i’ll put it here but i was very hyper vigilant which is something that i tend to to have and i realized as the day went on when it came to walking i slowed down my ears are being affected and i already have an issue with my ears but sometimes i i feel

As if my ears are blocking up or something i’m not sure how to explain it but it it feels as if my ears are being affected when it comes to my eyes it’s neither here or there i already have issues with my eyes anyway so i’m not sure if my eyes are being affected to be honest i don’t know probably not um but yeah those are my symptoms at the moment i don’t have

Any fidgety nests today i have a bit of a headache which is coming up this way i can feel it but again these things will pass now on to something else that i discovered in this journey it is so amazing how enlightening this journey is um i’m i’m being made aware of things that happened in my past that i had put far in the back or that my body saved me from

My mind saved relief from so that i wouldn’t be so i wouldn’t remember them because these things are traumatic but it was as if i got a a tick to verify that i truly am going through what i’m going through and that i’ve lived with it for all my life i my daughter she is also in search really and i’m very proud of her because she took charge of her mental

Health early when i mean when i should have because she’s in her 20s and she did that and i should have taken charge of my mental health even before that but she’s done that at an early age and now we can both talk about about the process how it um how the medication makes you feel what you’re going through now if you need to up a dose that sort of thing and

That that’s amazing but one thing that came out of it is the fact that because we we both have the same daughter and because my doctor knew me from the time i was a teenager um when my daughter went to talk to him about her mental health he verified that but you know that your mother has been struggling with depression for a long time before you were even born

And it was as if i needed someone i needed that to verify that yeah you see i am not kidding when i say i need to be on medication i’m not kidding when i say that i should have been on medication a long time ago she he told her that because it does run in family it came from me to her and there are other folks i am sure that are having their struggles who feel

Inhibited when it comes to being honest and genuine about their struggles but because of that verification that aha moment that moment of making me feel as if you see i am not dreaming i really have been i have been going through this all my life because of that i now have a new sense of confidence i do not need to be oh but yeah i’m on medication but you

Know i but i’m going to try to get off it if i have to be on it for life i have to be on it for life i i’m an asthmatic and i have to be on my asthma medication for life so if it so happens that i have to be on my medication whether it be circulating or anything else for life then fine if i don’t have to be well fined if i have to be on and off well fine because

This is me and because i should have been on it ever since when i sit down think about the times when i was a child and i would be on the floor hidden hiding away from people because i had social anxiety and they didn’t even know what it was back then i don’t know if anyone knew what it was but i had a real problem with people and i would hide under tables and

Things to get away from everybody or i would cry or i’d be down or i would i would haul my hair and pull it or i would have um ideation thoughts and things like that i mean i had these things from the time i was really young going to a psychiatrist when i was nine all of that why on earth then would i think that um now that i’ve waited almost 50 years to deal

With my mental health that that it would be okay to just say oh just fling some medication and just be yeah do it for a few months and then be done haven’t have a quote-unquote um time to just be done with it because yeah you can’t be on it no because i really need to take care of my mental health i have mental health issues and you know what i am declaring this

Here and it’s all right i will manage them and having that those issues doesn’t mean i’m not capable of being the best person that i can be i just need my medication and this is how it should be for all folks that are going through depression anxiety disorder that are going through ptsd and all the other things it should not be that it shouldn’t be that it’s

Some big stigma so that folks then don’t get their help they don’t get their medication and therefore they’re not better and they can’t cope it should be that they get their medication just as if you broke your foot and have to get that tended to just as if you had a head injury and you had to get that tended to just as if you had a heart ailment you had to get

That tended to you should be able to get your health your medic your mental health tended to as well you should be able to take the medication and and and be able to be comfortable in that without people pinpointing you as if something is wrong with you no it’s just another health thing that you need medication for that’s all it is and and the sooner that we can

All realize that and we can all come to a middle ground on that the better it would be for our society than people who are capable of things but just need the medication to to to simmer everything to put everything to how it should be those people would be more viable in in society and things without the finger pointing anyway that is my thing for today um

I think i’m going to have to go and rest because this headache really has me it literally is coming from here and coming ah i could just feel it by the way look at my gray hair i feel as if every day i look at my hair my hair is grayer which is funny anyway um but comment like and share and do all the things if you have not done it already please subscribe hit

The notification bell so that you’ll be notified whenever i post a video obviously i will be doing this more often so do make sure that notification bell is hit and share this far and wide share it to other people so that they will know that this is a community of inclusion this is a community of talking mental health support i am not a medical professional by

Any stretch of the imagination i am just an ordinarily a person who is going through her own her own journey with mental health and has come to this chapter of her life and would like to share and support and uplift so let’s do this and remember you are indeed needed and wanted here and you do not owe anyone any explanation for what is happening with you just

Thrive be your best self take care and i’ll talk to you again tomorrow bye now

Transcribed from video
Day 7 on Sertraline | My Mental Health Journey | A New Chapter By Lets_haveachat