January 26, 2023

blog post with this:

Hi yes what’s up my name is marissa and welcome to my channel or welcome back to my channel today is kind of going with my mental health videos that i’ve been doing just my experience and everything with it also just continuing it on and i’m gonna be talking about my experience with lexapro and it also has another name but i can’t really pronounce it so so i

Was on lexapro for about a month month and a half so after the inman clinic i picked up my prescription for it and i started it the next day so i’m pretty sure i started it on may 11th and i kind of experienced the basic symptoms i mean like stomach issues um headaches cramps and the night not much into it but so the first few days i kind of had those symptoms

And then they stopped i’ve already got used to it and i started at 5 milligrams for a week to 10 for a week to 15 for a week to 20 for a week to work my way up to it so my symptoms wouldn’t be that that either from going nothing to 20 milligrams um so that is what i did um i kind of only did it like five days instead of the full week because i like felt good and

Like i should go to the next milligrams just nice burn the first week i felt the word it’s like i felt hopeful is a good word i didn’t really feel much the first we get set for like those harsh symptoms that i’m like oh why don’t i take this in the first place and the second week i started to feel a little bit calmer and then the week after that i started to feel

Like my i felt like it’s as if my anxiety was getting better but my depression wasn’t getting better and then i started some things in life started to happen and i got depressed and i felt like okay i might oppression isn’t that bad as normal i should be feeling this during this normally and i’m like i shouldn’t be feeling this at all because i’m taking lexapro

So this doesn’t happen but the first week i had i felt that way and then i called the doctor and apparently she was gone so it’s a week after that it just felt like i was getting worse and then i started to get like really suicidal thoughts and just like every day i’m just like it’d be so easy if i wasn’t here like all these thoughts were just like running in my

Head which was scary and then i’m just like i life is hard right now and i’m just like trying to make all these excuses because like from the very beginning i don’t know why i’m flinging this around this is what i do when i talk but um so i just wanted this to work because i didn’t feel why because i didn’t want to be like a guinea pig this is why i didn’t want to

Take medication in the first place is to go through stuff it doesn’t work try something new it doesn’t where i did all this stuff like being a guinea pig was not what i wanted to do and then i was just kind of like angry i’m like i don’t want to take anything else i wanted this to work and like it did help with my anxiety but it’s supposed to help with depression

Too which i was getting no help in and then it just started to spiral down stupid fast which was scary and i mean i was just kind of keeping it in but i was just like numb ish like i was calmer mind’s eye he was good because of it but then like my depression got so bad and then i finally stopped taking it because i’m like okay i can’t live like this anymore and

I was still feeling this my like emptiness of why i wanted to take medicine so i’m like i could totally fight something else in my anxiety which i did and i’ll be doing another video about that you also be seeing that soon you know but just this process has lots of her stuff i was really frustrating because because like i said i didn’t want to be a guinea pig this

Is this is really hard for me to still talk about even though i really want to bring awareness to it but i mean this is like the real life of it i’m mad like i wanted something to work so hard i didn’t want to have to go through all this um i have started another antidepressant and we’re going to be seeing how that goes i’m only on like not even a week i think or

A week so yeah i wanted to be doing like a whole like oh month update on lexapro of getting my dosage up there and then like oh i’m good on the super video but instead i’m making this my short journey with lexapro because it made me want to kill myself and i mean it made me feel much like i felt before when i was like serious and like my worst depression i just

Felt like numb i didn’t care what’s happening i didn’t have any hope and all that stuff which like is why there hasn’t been videos because the two videos i recorded were like right before all of that feeling so it’s hard as of right now this new medication is working but um i still do have that like doubt and me of it’s gonna go good like you did with lexapro and

Then a month and i’m gonna start with suicidal thoughts and then i’ll have to find something else which i don’t want to do that i don’t want to take medication um so i’m also gonna be seen um an app a natural medicine person place and i’ll be going i’ll be filming that and all that stuff and like the supplements part of this on top of the medication part but each

One deserves their own video especially that even though this one’s probably gonna be a little bit shorter but just like an update because i did say i was taking lots of her in my a min clinic video and i wanted to do an update on what it is and the update is it did not work for me and i really wish it did it helped us my anxiety though like i said but why would i

Want something like that i could find something different that isn’t so harsh on me probably um so yeah not how i thought what and how a baby i think i’m hilarious but i’m really not um really all that i have to say that’s like my update with lexapro yeah i have my bright light so my face off okay anyways this has been turned into a way different video now because

I have nothing else to say so thumbs up leave a comment share your experiences if it works for you i’m so freaking because i wish it worked for me um it did seem good i think good thing i really didn’t like mess me up like physically in that way with the symptoms like it was like the first like four days and then i was good so i hope that was the same for you if

You do take it i do also recommend starting off at a low milligram and then working your way up to the full milligram my doctor did that and then i’ve done it before because i did read a lot of reviews on it and there are a lot of mixed reviews and people saying oh just arted taking 20 milligrams and i felt like and my stomach her and it’s like yeah you should

Have started low and worked your way up to it um subscribe to my channel new videos coming soon i have more videos like this um i’m also trying to do fun stuff because this isn’t like always like the fun stuff to see but it is educational in my experience and that’s what i want to do bringing awareness like it’s okay to talk about this stuff um but as of right

Now life kinda boring but it isn’t a pickup once i could film those videos i post them i’m gonna be so happy it’s like i have this big news that you guys don’t know i’m ready for him it’s such a good thing for me and my future with my little family yeah all of that thumbs up i hope you had an amazing day and i’ll see you next time

Transcribed from video
my *short* journey with lexapro/escitalopram (my first med) By happylilmarissa