February 8, 2023

#healthanxiety #depression #anxiety #Agoraphobia #mentalhealth

Hey what’s going on my there people just uh give me all the update of how stuff been going for me in my fight with anxiety and depression and health anxiety and agoraphobia and all this different stuff um i i finished my program my treatment program i was in on may 15th is now on june 17 cuz i you know pretty much a month since i’ve been out um i would say stuff

Has been going good for the most part um i still have my moments i still get triggered i still ruminate a lot that’s one thing that i was really trying to get ahold of get a hold on but i still roommate a lot i still get triggered um i still have the rapid heartbeat i still have body sensations and stuff like that but i’ve gotten better on how to cope with it and

Deal with it and also how i respond to a noun so i think when i was doing a lot of the exposures in the erp when i was in the program has helped me deal with when i’m having tingling sensations or having you know sharp pains coming through my neck or whatever kind of spasms or whatever the case might be i might have i learned how to kind of sit with it and deal

With it better and then just hop in the car and run in to the emergency room i haven’t been to the emergency room since march or something like that so i would say i’ve been doing pretty good but i haven’t really been as consistent as i would like to be as far as still doing exposure started like driving on the freeway still driving far walking far doing it with

My phone without my phone um i haven’t been as consistent as i should have been as i should be um i still have you know i still have that fear a little bit of fear and stuff like that so but yeah like i said i’m still a work in progress i’m still working on a lot of bad habits i’m still retraining my mind to think a certain way to look look at things a certain

Way so yeah so i’ve been definitely been doing that but i said still tough still no meds at all but then again if you have to take medicine to to help assist you with your fight i definitely suggest and recommend you doing it but do what’s best for you you know do your research and things of that nature medicines not for everybody right i just chose not to do it

With the medicine i felt like if i could be consistent and committed to getting better without medicine i’ll do that first and then if that didn’t work then i’ll get my medicine but i was consistent and i was committed to getting better without the medicine i have been getting better i’m just sitting outside right now so that’s definitely a start but like i said

Definitely want to be more consistent with doing more exposure stuff outside of work giving it i might be going back to work soon i definitely want to be able to adapt and readjust back in that environment so so yeah definitely be more consistent and i need to actually meditate more like i said just a lot of stuff you know get complacent we see some progress and

We can be stagnant in our treatment because we’re not consistent with it outside of whether our program we’re just outside of us feeling better afterwards so i definitely want to give back have a calm the calm app i do that i have kaiser so it’s free for kaiser members for a whole year i believe so if you have kaiser log on to your kaiser account and type in like

Calm and you keep it like the link and how to do it and stuff like that so that’s free like i said before i did i’d watch these videos with michael norman at his cat named michael norman panic free tv i did his meditation video it was like 40 minutes or so i didn’t it was like some type of hypnotherapy kind of thing i did it and it worked i had like a good couple

Of days i had almost a week honestly but if i do do that when i try to do it when i’m going to sleep because you know that stuff was a being yo you know you know inner consciousness subconscious mind and stuff like that so i try to do that at night when i’m on my way to sleep or something in that nature if i need to be consistent with meditating i mean even just

Stretching working out and stuff like that i’m still working my way in there doing those things just because i still have my fears and still ruminate about certain things and stuff like that so i’m definitely working on that but i have been better though i definitely have been better no uh no emergency room from one to ten i would say my panic attacks probably

Have been maybe had a six or something like that maybe maybe like a six um i will say the physical feeling is in there as much but the rumination and the thoughts is more stronger than actual physical sensation so which is better is better for me um so that has been cool but yeah i would say my panic attacks being like a five my sleeping stuff being pretty normal

For the most part except i’m still able to you know chill the next to my kids be present with them you know with my lady and everybody like that i haven’t really been able to hang out giving what’s going on and stuff like that i’m you know i’m not return to go hang out anyways whether people think it’s real coronas real or not i’m now i don’t want to take no risk

On that but i have been driving places here near i still get triggered we’re driving on the freeway and stuff like that um so i still get triggered i just tried to relax to be calm and tell myself i’m just driving a little a little bit of reassurance you know what i mean and when i am feeling triggered or feeling nervous or i do feel sensations i try not to judge

It i try not to judge and i try not to like you know how we get these sensations with us in the hair body neck foot and we try to figure it out or we’re trying to associate it with a certain kind of disease and stuff like that yeah y’all know how we do it so i try not to do that anymore so i try not to do that i try to just accept it for what it is and just try

To breathe and they’re trying to continue doing whatever it was i was doing whether it’s being a shower or you know in the toilet or walking around a corner or driving for whatever matter i just remember i tried to stay focused on what i was doing and not so much get sidetracked into the thoughts and stuff like that cause that’s when you know start to go left so

Um i definitely try to do that so um you know like i said just update you know with my anxiety and depression and my panic attacks him in my phobias and everything like that i’ve been working on me slowly i haven’t been as consistent as i should have since i finished my program on may 15th it’s now june 17th i’m sorry deaf utley one to be more consistent and

I definitely give you guys an update on that so i probably make a video i want to say like in another two weeks or something like that and in this gray hairs always great you got some of your face i got a great joint but um but yeah probably another two weeks or something like that i make it be doesn’t have it made one so far i hope all is well with you guys i

Hope you guys are doing great remember you’re not in this fight alone we’re all in this together just like i said comment you know whatever you guys can do to try to help me out and we need words of encouragement i can give you guys you guys can give me yeah so you know i’m strong you’re strong we in this together you know we all got to fight this fight you know

Especially with everything that’s going on in the world which is very triggering especially me being a black man is there’s definitely triggering so i don’t know it’s kind of you know that’s tough to kind of deal with your own stuff and dealing with that is in his trickery but then again you know where i come from is this is i’m kinda almost used to it it’s kind of

The norm seeing that kind of stuff with his own the camera and i which unfortunately shouldn’t be the norm for people but it is so i do get trigger but then again is kind of like i’m used to seeing stuff like that that’s really just for the world to see the people that’s not used to seeing it kind of stuff it out yeah you know like i said just keep fighting don’t

Give up if you need help whatever kind of stuff like that so you know don’t be afraid to reach out whether it’s to me or whatever there’s always great people in the comment section giving good advice and has been through the same thing we all been through so you know if i can’t help you they can or whatever words of encouragement or good advice i can give you you

Know every child you know so once again i can say is just update that you guys know i’ve been doing this stuff like that and hope you all have been doing well and i wish everyone the best of luck and hopefully i could post me another video in the next two weeks or so yeah keep you guys i’ll be there alright good people appreciate your time and you guys hey

Transcribed from video
Still off Buspirone and post treatment progress By Stepa_moo